“I hate being around femmes. Sorry - I’m just not into femmes”

actual. status. on. fb.

Posted on: 8th May 2012 - 24 notesReblog

30 Day Fem/me challenge: Day 1

dearjimmoriarty:

Why Do You Identify As Femme?

As a child, I appeared to fit into the prescribed modes of nineteenth-century femininity with incredible ease. 

I was shy, elegant, and quiet. 

My first word was cat, with a decisive emphasis on the ‘t’. (and no, I wasn’t born “Kat”. That’s one of the names I go by now.)

I sipped tea with my pinky outstretched and planned to one day marry my mother. 

When my mom dressed me in pants, it ruined my whole day. 

I was well-read and rarely rambunctious. 

I didn’t need a band-aid until I was two years old. 

I carried a lace parasol with me at all times and wore white gloves whenever possible. 

I dreamed of going to finishing school and cried when forced to play kickball. 

I sometimes wanted to be a boy. 

I loved glitter and purple and pink and the smell of the lipstick I applied before ballet performances. 

I wasn’t fast enough to win at tag. 

I won a hula-hooping marathon after two and a half hours. 

I dressed in an old t-shirt, put my hair up under a hat, and made my best friend’s mom call me Keith. 

My “save in case of fire” list was topped by my Lisa Frank folders. 

It took me twenty two years to realize that I was genderfluid.

It took me twenty three to realize that I was femme. 

In the struggle to understand my masculinity, I refused to think about my femme side. My expression of femininity isn’t as compliant with patriarchal norms as it once was. 

I’m breaking out, and I see femme in everything I am and everything I love. 

Femme. Science Fiction. Velvet. Femme. Nerd. Obnoxious. Loud. Femme. Bookish. Fan. D/s. Thinking about the universe. Femme. Never painting my nails. Lipstick when I fucking feel like it. Never shaving. Femme. 

Because I have scoliosis and can’t lift anything over thirty pounds, but that doesn’t make me weak. 

Because I was eight years old and performing ballet on the side of a fountain, giving no fucks, wearing sneakers and a cowboy hat. 

Because I’ve seen myself.

This is by far one of the most glorious things I have ever read

Posted on: 2nd February 2012 - 17 notesReblog

Where are all the femme allies?!

Why is it always Femmes who call out femmephobia? Where are our allies?  Why aren’t you all standing up beside us?

Posted on: 27th October 2011 - 6 notesReblog

New Facebook Group for Femmes and Femme Allies!

Because of the recently femmephobia I am dealing with, I thought creating a fb group for Femmes and our allies might allow us to vent some of our frustrations.

Here is the link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/208645485872093/

Please join and forward widely!!!!!

Posted on: 26th October 2011 - 9 notesReblog

MAN [tw femmephobia]

funkkyfreshdowne:

where are all the fem lesbians on tumblr at?!

its like they don’t exist on here…hahaha XP

I’ll be honest, I enjoy eye candy. Especially if their blog is interesting to me.

 -deep breath-

Ok.  So this was on the femme tag.  And I need to slow down, because this post made me extremely upset.

The first line, ok.  The second line, ok.  Femme lesbians are invisible a lot.

And then the third line happens.

I’ll be honest, I enjoy eye candy

Great. So now we’re just eye candy to you.  We have (once again) become sexual objects for someone else’s consumption.  So you aren’t looking for femme people, you’re looking for femme bodies.

Especially if their blog is interesting to me.

“Interesting” is an afterthought.  Because it doesn’t matter if we have substance.  The most important thing is that we fulfill some sexist fantasy of femininity.

Well, I’ve got news.

I am not femme for you or any other person.  I am femme for me.  And if you have this attitude, we will continue to ellude you. 

Posted on: 26th October 2011 - 19 notesReblog

[tw femmephobia]

“You aren’t like other femmes.  Most femmes are whiney and superficial.  You actually have some depth.  You are able to think about more than your hair.  Ugh, why are femmes always so stupid?”

….

News flash: This is NOT a way to get me to like you.  In fact, it is a great way to get me to blow you off as an ignorant femmephobic loser. 

by the way, I think about my hair all the time.  And how fucking how it is, especially surrounding my beautiful brain.

Posted on: 23rd October 2011 - 11 notesReblog